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| Hatch | grrrr... dawson needs a good smack in the head
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| MadDog | he needs a good boof up the ass by some prison
inmates...
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| MadDog | YOU CAN HELP ME!
Got a little problem... I saw a little brown
blob fly across the floor in my lounge room
tonight and it ended up behind the wall
unit... right... now I thought "Shit.. a
mouse... heavy..."... so I got a mouse trap..
one of those plastic grey ones that dont chop
your fingers off.. you know.. the safety
ones... anyway.. I put a blob of jam on it and
put it at the opening behind the wall unit...
5 minutes ago... it went SNAP! ... hmmm...
from what I can see with the torch, the trap
has gone off, and there is some small dead
creature's head inside of it.... I'm kinda
freaked out right now... what if I pick up the
trap and it falls out and starts twitching
about the place.. I mean... I'm really freakin
out!!!!
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| Hatch | if it is twitching.. just stomp on it real
good
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| MadDog | NOOOOO!!!
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| Hatch | or you could try and revive him, and name him
Zanzaba...
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| MadDog | nup.. Ive got my oven mitts, my bbq tongs, a
mini shovel, a plastic bag, an old tea towel,
and 3 pairs of underpants.... I'm goin in...
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| Hatch | hehehe
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| Hatch | You got that mouse yet?
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| MadDog | I cant do it.. gonna try again...
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| Hatch | can't do it.. its only a mouse..
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| Hatch | and a dead one at that.
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| MadDog | satan mouse..
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| MadDog | and it might not be dead.. I might be just
sitting there channeling its spiritual chi
energy....
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| Hatch | yeah.. or it might be dead..
get grace to do it..
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| MadDog | she's asleep... okay.. I'll get it.. but if it
starts shooting fireballs at me, I'll blame
you!
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| Hatch | hehe.. put it in the fridge in the egg carton
or something.. and really freak grace out..
now that would be funny.
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| MadDog | hhehehehee
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| MadDog | the deed is done....
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| Hatch | was it dead?
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| MadDog | yeah... such a small little fellla too... just
a baby... he ... he looked so cute... *sniff*
he was just a baby.. *snif sniff*
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| Hatch | baby.. and you KILLED HIM... you killer of
animals.. I oughta report you to the RSPCA..
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| MadDog | *sniff*
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| Hatch | You're on your way to becoming a man..
well done.
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| MadDog | *notices gonads have expanded in diameter by
at least an inch*
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| Hatch | Ok.. that was just a bit too much
information..
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| MadDog | dont lie... you loved that little bit of
info...
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| Hatch | to tell ya the truth.. yup..
my penis enlarged by at least an inch when you
told me..
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| MadDog | AAAAHHHHHHH!!!! Now thats fucking scary!
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| Hatch | I know.. if it gets any bigger.. I'm gonna
have to take a mortage out on the house to
make some more extensions on my penis
warehouse holding device.
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| MadDog | you mean a mortgage out on the house that you
dont own....
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| Hatch | yeah.. small tid bits of information that
aren't important.
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| MadDog | ahh.. tidbits...
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| Hatch | hehe.. I wrote tit bits, but I had to change
it.. dam brain.
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| MadDog | AHA!! I am the squisher of rodents!! I am so
manly!! My nads are the size of small houses!!
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| Hatch | Ok.. I get your point.. you don't have to keep
rubbing it in.
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| MadDog | small houses I tell you!
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| Hatch | *nods with the knowledge of the small house
firmly imprinted on ones brain*
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| Hatch | going to wash my hair
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| MadDog | HAH! little girly hairwashing boy girl..
hahah1
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| Hatch | Hey.. I need to wash my hair too ya know
sometimes
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| MadDog | dont ya wash it when you have a shower or
something?
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| Hatch | yeah.. when I have a shower in a minny.. I'll
wash it.. I don't like wetting my hair
everytime i have a shower though
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| MadDog | oh... so youre not just going to wash your
hair and your hair only are you.. like over a
sink or something...
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| Hatch | no.. I'll wash it when I'm in the shower, but
I don't wet my hair everytime I take a shower.
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| MadDog | ahhh.. well thats good.. your manliness has
been restored...
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| Hatch | good..
*off to restore his manliness*
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| MadDog | dont forget the kleenex...
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| MadDog | It is I, the Oracle.. ask of me any question
you will and I shall miraculously answer it...
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| Hatch | how come Stan of southpark doesn't have his
period?
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| MadDog | The Oracle knows no single answer to this
question, for there is no single answer. For
each of us, the answer is different. The trick
is to know yourself well enough so that when
the answer presents itself to you -- and it
will -- you will be able to recognize it.
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| Hatch | ah.. oh.. ok then mr oracle.. by the way.. I
luved your database system
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| MadDog | thank you.
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| Hatch | not that I know how to use it or anything.
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| MadDog | i wouldnt expect someone of you insolence to
be able to control such a miraculous
development in data management.
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| Hatch | bugger you oracle dude..
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| MadDog | Sorry.. damn oracle took over my keyboard
again.. I've locked him in the cupboard
again....
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| Hatch | I'm waiting for buffy
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| MadDog | ahh.. might change the channel then...
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| Hatch | good idea
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| MadDog | I'm full of good ideas... like get this... a
little paddle attached to a rubber ball by a
length of elastic... then you hit the ball
with the paddle, then it bounces back, because
of the elastic and all... cool eh? I reckon i
could market that... call it the "Boingo-Bat"
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| Hatch | ahh.. mate.. I think someone's already come up
with that idea...
ever been to the shepp show.. I used to get
those crappy toys in the show bags...
the image of one of those toys must have been
put there in your unconcious mind, without you
knowing.. thats why its called the unconcious
mind.
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| Hatch | yeah.. all the celebs have big mouths..
haven't you noticed that.. saw some interview
with Julia Roberts the other day, and my god
has she got a mouth and a half.. Hmm.. didn't
take me long to realise how she got into the
business...
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| MadDog | yeah... I heard she makes nice blueberry
muffins...
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| Hatch | whats that got to do with the size of her
mouth?
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| MadDog | well.. umm.. theres.. ummm... well theyre big
muffins.. so she has a big mouth to eat the
muffins.. and she gives them to the casting
directors so she can get roles in movies...
isnt that what you were talking about?
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| MadDog | Warning:
Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell
the same boring story over and over again
until your friends want to smash your face in.
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| Braden M | hehehehe.. quite true.. :-)
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| MadDog | Florida University (at) Cape Kennedy
heheh.. F.U.C.K.! hehehe
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| Braden M | woohoo.. wish I hadda gone to F.U.C.K
univeristy.. I hear the chicks go right orrff
there..
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| MadDog | when you play duke3d, and you're around one of
the dancing ladies, do you ever... well do you
ever just sort of slip your left hand down
from the run button for a sec.. not for long,
but do you every ... gently squeeze your
testicles? ... I don't, I was just curious.
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| Braden M | I did all for the COOKIE..
uh
the COOKIE
uh..
the COOKIE..
so you can taste me cookies..
I baked it in the OVEN,
baked it in the OVEN,
baked it in the OVEN.
My alternate chefs version of Nookie...
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| MadDog | "sir, I'm asking you ONE more time... DID YOU
LOOK DIRECTLY AT THE PENIS?"
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| Braden M | hehe.. I understand your dilemma
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| MadDog | you dont understand shit man... nobody
understands... you dont know what its like to
be adopted!!!
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| Braden M | Quote from Tad from Neighbours..
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| MadDog | Braden.. Youre acting like a real jerk lately,
you know that? You just leave harold alone..
Were just trying to help...
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| Braden M | Well sorry ... PAUL lover.. :-)q
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| MadDog | Youre such a little brat
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| Braden M | You are such a rupunzal loving goose eye
chicken sandwhich biting delivery boy ... ya
know that..
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| MadDog | youve got cerebral herpes
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| Braden M | you've.. um.. you.. yeah.. you've got.. got
milk.. :-)
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| MadDog | Thats the 3rd time that hippy dredlock guy has
been to the toilet in the last 10 minutes...
I think he may be incontinent
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| Braden M | hahhaa.. or maybe he's stealing our toilet
paper.
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| MadDog | I think he may...
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| Braden M | and hiding it up his arse..
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| MadDog | hiding it in his hair..
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| Braden M | or swallowing them, then turding them out, and
wiping his arse to clean up the mess.
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| MadDog | possibly... I think...
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| Braden M | no where on the web can I find how to do the
death touch.. this sux..
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| MadDog | Ask me... I know all
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| Braden M | Um.. how do I kill people?
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| MadDog | like this...
*kills you*
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| Braden M | ahhh... :-)
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| MadDog | *rivives you with leaves from the mana tree*
There my child... re you enligtened?
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| Braden M | Ooh.. mana tree tasty.. yummy yummy!
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| MadDog | Good... now be off with you...
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