The Russ

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Russ-work did u know the shin bone's connected to the knee bone?
MadDog nah... I knew the knee-bone was connected to the thigh bone though... Ive always wondered what was on the other side of that....
Russ-work well now you know.

Russ-work Word to the wise don't trust brian he's evil!
MadDog what do you base that on?
Russ-work I just know, i can't tell you any more just be careful!
MadDog ooh.... okay......

Russ-work You should see this men! Beer in ice as far as the eye can see! Tubs and tubs of it!! overflowing with all kinds of glorious beers we got it all! The whole department in gonna have a giant bash outside my window soon at that bbq i've told you about where the students go. Man i told you about we take any excuse to have morning tea. And it's my job to look after the beer!! I'm left to guard it in a world of uni students agghh!!!
MadDog I dont envy you mate.... unless you get to drink it all....
Russ-work Oh god it's GONE!!
Russ-work only kidding :)
MadDog hee!
Russ-work yep *hic!* more stick then i can *hic!* polk a beer at :)
MadDog .... ummm... I got berrocas!! :o) ??

MadDog *missooman!*
Russ-work hehehe Mooseman? hehehe

MadDog Bouncy land...
Russ-work bounty.
MadDog Intergalactic planetary something something something something....
Russ-work i'm listening to evidence by faith no more in spanish.
MadDog haaaaa! cooll.... It'd be as much fun as watching the cosby show in German.... which is a real hoot!

Russ-work If everyone in ITS have small peenies and you know it clap your hands *CLAP!* *CLAP!*
MadDog peenie?

Russ-work How do i get to the old ozchat bbq pics buddy?
Russ-work Sorry i found them my monitor is missing blue at the moment so i couldn't see it. :)
MadDog dont go looking at smurf homepages then

Russ-work i can't really remember how i got myself into the final's of the girl's under seventeen's kick boxing championships. What i do remember is that Burtha, the reigning title holder weighing in at 280 pounds did a good job of taking me out of it. Down in three rounds and in hospital for as many days. Really they shouldn't allow stilhetto steel capped boots in the competition. Not only did it break me but also a perfectly good pair of leggings.

MadDog Apparently, you do the Hokey-Pokey... THEN you turn around. And to think I'd been doing it the wrong way around all these years.
Russ but mad that's what it was all about you see?
MadDog AHA! That was the answer I was waiting for!!!!

Russ Well i cried myself to sleep at night for months until someone finally let me in on the secret that the three blind mice were only fictional characters. And to think i donated thousands of dollars to that save the blind mice guy who guilt tripped me.

Russ they told me that someone had stolen them both. But i knew otherwise. I knew that someone hadn't stolen remmi the hamster and my colour gameboy. No. No one knew remmi as well as i did. I knew that remmi had sold my colour gameboy to support her ever growing addiction to cocaine laced lettuce leaves. Later that day in an alley i saw her, head fully in a baked beans can vomitting, though i didn't mention it to her at dinner that night.

Russ the first time i went back to remmi's pad, it was a huge, stylist inner city apartment. She put down her keys, kicked off her heels and took off her earrings. That was when i knew she was a hamster with taste. She was so smart. She told me how van gogh had really been a hamster, and she even had a couple of the originals with paw print signings. So far so good? It was when i saw that she slept in a cage, i thought there might be problems.

Russ We call our partner's baby. Baby spice was the most talked about spice. When an attractive woman speaks baby talk and gets all pouty we get aroused. What is it in man's genes that makes him want to screw babies?

Russ i went along with her for morale support. As soon as the doctor hypnotised her it all came out. She started speaking about how in a past life she had been a in espionage hamster for the resistance. Wearing her miniature beret she'd seduce young german generals, and lure them into a lockable hamster hutch. She also started talking about one time she took out a whole platoon of german tanks, but unfortunately that's where the session ended.

Russ she had dissappeared. No word and the mail had started collecting in her lettuce box. Finally came to me. She told me her cousin had been struck down with feed pellet poisoning so she had to look after him. She asked if i could drop off a family tree she had got for her mother. On the way to drop it off i had a quick look noticing some stars next to deceased relatives. It puzzled me so i looked at the key, it read "star denotes road kill".

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