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| Russ | You will experience the joy of seeing a small
child's face light up like a Christmas tree
when you grind your cigarette into his
petrol-soaked hair.
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| Russ | have a good weekend?
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| MadDog | as good as gold and twice as shiney
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| Russ | Do you prefer a beating with a newspaper over
a magazine?
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| MadDog | news paper for sure....
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| Russ | ..so there i was, camera's rolling, hanging by
my feet upside down from the roof at madame
kiki's bondage emporium wondering how i'd got
myself into another one of these messes. It
was about then when i started getting my
suspicions about the whole, brownies bondage
for bucks charity thing. There was something
odd about the whole set up that didn't sit
well with me. And madame kiki was definately
no girl-scout.
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| Russ | Justifications for why she feels uncomforable
watching you masturbate:
1. It's too early in the relationship and she
doesn't want to feel easy.
2. She's a frigid tease who shouldn't have
been playing the game if she was going to feel
shame.
3. It was her fault for sitting next to you
on the bus anyway.
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| Russ | Top Five signs that tim pulled his patented,
"Got Ready For Work in Eight Minutes" routine
this morning:
5. Unshaven.
4. Hoping that the shower last night and the
rexona will hold up.
3. Socks Don't Match
2. Doesn't have work keys and is using the
emergency ones.
1. Wearing a hat to disguise the fact his hair
is out of control.
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| MadDog | Heee... got the same thing happning here...
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| Russ | The worst thing is, I spent four minutes
looking for my keys this morning so really it
was a four minute preparation. That shifts it
to Defcon 2.
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| Russ | Defcon 1 is not having changed yer socks and
undies. Which fortunately I did.
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| MadDog | Phew!
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| MadDog | MY GOD! A chick from the cafe just walked
past... each breast bigger than my head...
wow!
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| Russ | YEAH BABY!
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| Russ | So you comin to my 21st?
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| MadDog | have I been invited?
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| Russ | You just were.
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| MadDog | YAAY! Well then ofcourse I'll be there..... I
miss you man!!
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| Russ | Excellent, excellent....my plan is coming into
fruition!... err i mean i miss you too man.
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| Russ | Ok you will be recieving your "fun pack"
including directions, show bag, ticket to fun
and photo of myself so you wont upstage me on
the night dress wise.
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| MadDog | I shall wear a sack and a tie...
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| Russ | good work. In fact you will be getting none
of those forementioned items yer on your own.
Also i'm still negotiating if i can get
everyone to put in five bucks each and get the
tab extended to include spirits.
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| MadDog | mmmm.... boooze...
well that might turn off those that dont drink
spirity stuff...
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| Russ | do.... dri.. ... don't drink spirity stuff?
Who on earth wouldn't drink spirity stuff?
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| MadDog | hmmm... the amish?
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| Russ | no i didn't invite her.
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| MadDog | thats good.. she annoys the hell out of me...
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| Russ | yeah her with all of her farming and non-power
using and stuff.
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| MadDog | yeah... and every 5 minutes with her "LETS
RAISE A BARN! LETS RAISE A BARN!".. it makes
me sick...
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| Russ | yeah me too..... nice hooters though.
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| MadDog | yeah.. 'tis a crying shame... they make ya
wanna sit up and scream for butermilk...
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| Russ | sweeeeeet sweeeeet buttermilk..
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| MadDog | hey, are you gonna supply the crash helmet?
because I dont do the cannon without a cash
helmet... I gotta call my agent...
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| Russ | of course.
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| MadDog | goood...
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| Russ | just don't land on the drum kit like last
time.
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| MadDog | believe me, I dont wanna have to go through
THAT kind of surgery again....
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| Russ | good. by the way i think i still have a peice
of your ear.
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| MadDog | aahh!! keep it for me wont you?
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| Russ | Sure.
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| MadDog | Ta
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| Russ | Excellent so i'm going.
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| MadDog | Fare thee well fine fellow...
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| Russ | you a web god yet?
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| MadDog | even better.. I'm a web architect!
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| Russ | nup you've always been that. I'm talkin'
pontiff here.
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| MadDog | Ahhh... no I havent attained that status
yet.. I need 4000 more experience points and
the Staff of Netscapia. Then, dear friend, the
net will be MINE!
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| Russ | well that is..*rolls 20 sided dice and lands
on 20* excellent to hear!
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| MadDog | Excelcior!
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| Russ | lets not get carried away.
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| MadDog | youre right.. I'm so close.. I cant allow
myself to get foolish and squander away all
I've earned... Thankyou for your guidance,
great Oracle... umm.. Tim...
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| Russ | I'm sure you have always known the truth
grasshopper you just hadn't wanted to realise
it until now. Now, take this pebble from my
hand.
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| Russ | If you want to destroy my sweater, hold this
thread as a I walk away... errr grasshopper.
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| MadDog | HAHAH!... um. ahem... yes..
*takes object from your hand*
*replaces jade fertility idol*
*takes pebble from other hand*
Oops.. wrong hand... sorry...
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| Russ | 'tis ok...
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| MadDog | hey.. where can I get me one of them?
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| Russ | one of what?
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| MadDog | one of them there... ahem.. fertility idols...
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| Russ | you can have mine if you wish?
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| MadDog | Oh, I couldnt possibly... oh thankyou!!!
*does the fertility dance*
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| Russ | no the fertility does not dance.
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| Russ | yoyo
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| Mikey | dont mind if I do...
*eats the yoyo biscuit*
TAYSTEE!!
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| Russ | Yo ma niggah! How's it. I be missin' you ma
bruvva!
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| Mikey | i dun was bin missin you to bruzcuznuz...
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| Mikey | Hey, when it launches, the new version of my
hompage has a complete collection of your ICQ
"... so " messages...
:)
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| Russ | No schitt man. I thought i'd lost those, Ace!
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| Russ | ..'member to put copyright 1999 or sumptin on
it.
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| Mikey | heheh... I've gone through so many ICQ logs
lately...
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| Russ | Find anything else of interest?
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| Mikey | quite a few wacky conversations...
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| Russ | Including guest appreances by aerosmith, bon
jovi, the scared weird little guys, hanson....
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| Mikey | and the little fat kid from hey dad...
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| Russ | Aww, boot that's not fair meester kelly!
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| Mikey | HAHAH..
hup.. nature calls... brbr
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| Russ | "brbr"? Is it that cold in the dunny?
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| Mikey | quite, I got stuck to the seat...
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| Russ | Don't you know not to lick frozen things yet?
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| Mikey | I thought that only happened in the movies...
well now I know better...
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| Russ | Yeap, hey and remember not to go through doors
before you open them too, little tip for ya
fella.
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| Mikey | even wooden doors?
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| Russ | even wooden doors.
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| Mikey | wow.. I'm sure glad I spoke to you today...
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| Russ | Hey don't mention it, and mikey, stay away
from lions and the hollow end of pistols.
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| Mikey | even the Sex Pistols?
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| Russ | no mikey that doesn't include the sex pistols.
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| Mikey | phew....
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| Russ | Can't you see that... oh never mind.
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| Russ | gtg boyo
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| Mikey | F.A.B. JOHN!!
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| Russ | are you reading this? (testing firewall)
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| Mikey | I AM READING THIS ON MY INTARWEB
CUPPUTTERSCREEN!!! LOLL!!!11!
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